The continued prayer is, “Lord keep me focused. Keep my mind stayed on You. Help me to bring You praise. I know You believe in me. Please help me in my unbelief. Amen.”
This was a cleansing of sorts. My previous 5-mile run, on Saturday was great because I ran with a friend, but it might have been a little overzealous. I still wasn’t quite recovered from the run before that one, which included some hill work and speed intervals and it left me suffering with some sciatic issues.
I believe the sciatic issues were passed by then but because I had been compensating for the pain in my hip, my lower back was KILLING me! So Saturday’s run was a little too much too soon. I knew it at the time, but I had committed to the run and I really really *really* wanted to do it.
The next 2 days were spent paying for my heedlessness. After much resting, stretching, heat padding and mourning the three-year anniversary of the death of The King of Pop (God rest his brilliant soul), I felt like I was ready to take another stab at it.
I started this run out with prayer and supplication. I really needed to find the joy again and I needed GOD’s help with that.
When I first started running, joy was everywhere. Just being out in the open air, being in awe of GOD’s Creation and how fearfully and wonderfully made we all are was enough to bring me joy. Discovering how far I could push my body without destroying myself was joyous.
But now I know I can go the distance and I’ve discovered the pace I’m happiest with. I know the *exact* point at which my training’s gone from beneficial to detrimental. Indeed, that line keeps moving, but I still know when it’s coming. Perhaps when my children are a little older, I can see the line between safety and over training, and blow right passed it but for now, I must keep the over training to a minimum.
When I over train, the kids eat junk food, their laundry doesn’t get done, the kitchen’s a mess and the kids may brush, but I’m positive, they don’t floss. Life always takes a bit of a nose dive when Mom’s on her back.
So this run had to be different. So I took to my journal and my prayer list which covers everything from running, to work, to kids, to church, to sex to just about whatever needs to be purged from my mind, so I can move on. And in desperation, I asked GOD to help me find the joy and the love again.
Cuz there is love out there: Real, honest, physical, all-encompassing love. Love that finds Jesus, presents dead loved ones (The first time I ran 10 miles, I swear, I saw my grandmother, who had been gone for 30 years. I was so exhausted and she told me, “Keep going. It’s not your time yet.”), and sends blood racing to my naughty bits and leaves me amorous and insatiable.
That’s what I find on a run. When I’m desperate to find it, it meets me out there. Out on the run.
I had to push to find it, but as always, it was there and I was glad to find it again.
I'll Be There
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